Each phase of life has challenges and we must have proper plans to meet them
We, human beings, are an intelligent species. It is expected from us that we will lead meaningful lives, which means steady progress throughout our existence in the present bodies. How do we do that? We must be focused at all times. And the right age is no later than 15. I have divided the lifespan into five parts. These are 16 to 30, 31 to 45, 46 to 60, 61 to 75 and 76 onwards. Each part has different challenges and we must have proper plans to meet them.
Starting with the 16 to 30, we are expected to complete our education and training and get settled in some occupation to begin earning and maintaining selves. The next period of 31 to 45 should be for getting settled nicely in family life. The third period of 46 to 60 should be for meeting midlife challenges with grandchildren becoming part of our family lives. The next period of 61 to 75 is to begin turning spiritual, if not already turned in the earlier phase. The last period of 76 onwards is to seek shelter from God seriously.
Now going into details of each phase, the planning in the 16 to 30 part should be to plan what we wish to specialise in. This must take into consideration our abilities. This is where planning helps; it forces us to assess properly. A connected matter is choosing an occupation. We must decide whether working for someone suits us or going into business for ourselves is better. In this case, nature must be seriously examined, because anything contrary to our natures will not work. Lord Krishna made it very clear when He alerted us in the Bhagavad-Gita, “Work Should be according to one's nature only, even though appearing inferior. If one doesn't do this, there will be fearful consequences.” (3.35) We see it also every day. A person misfit to do business goes into it and wastes a lot of savings for self and parents. Personally speaking, we should always begin with working for someone else and learn the practical side of life. Subsequently, we can go into business, if we choose to, which I did.
The next phase of 31 to 45 must have a decision about marriage, if not made earlier with help from parents, mostly done in India. We must be clear in what we want in our life partner. Only then, we have a good chance that our marriage will succeed. Similarly, we should be clear in what we want in the matter of our wives’ working and having children. The first question is easily answered by the quantum of personal income. If the wife has to work, we must be prepared to not be so suspicious, just because she has to work with males. The connected issue of how to bring up children should be similarly addressed. What kind of help is necessary, especially from parents? This kind of planning brings into focus many important matters, which have a bearing on our future. The next phase is important for different reasons. Health starts to become an issue, if not already has become one. Lots of discipline is required. Then, Retirement brings its challenges, if in a job. One must plan what he or she wants to do in such an eventuality. This is where spirituality is the only real solution; any other is temporary only; and really cannot help, as one gets into the 76 onwards phase of life. If one is not connected with God, bad karmaphalas can cause havoc at times. Our planning for any phase of life must be realistic. Because we are only one factor in how our future unfolds, in which our ‘prarabdha’ (destiny) is very important. Our planning must be very flexible. Good planning helps us to remain focused. We can be positive as we move forward in life, thus avoiding frustration to a great degree. Our direction has to be right. For example, if we plant a mango tree, its fruits will only be available after many years. Even if we cannot control results, we won't be too far away from our plans. In the end, I will re-emphasise the role of God in our planning; He has to help. Because God guides and helps those who take His shelter. In human birth, we have this golden opportunity. Plan well with God in the picture and get focused. You can enjoy a quality life.
(The writer is a spiritual teacher; views expressed are personal)
