Effective communication demands more than mere words; it requires rhythm, empathy and the ability to adapt to the nuances of each moment
Communication is central to existence. All living creatures communicate with each other, and there are people who believe that even plants and foliage, amongst other leafy life existences, communicate with each other. In certain cases, language is coded, and in other cases, the impact is seen not because of a translation of a coded language but because of the results it produces.
The long and short of the matter is that communication is a way of transmission of feelings, ideas, possible actions, and more. Volumes of literature have been surfaced in different languages about communication, which can take place through eyes and without making a sound.
However, a language code is necessary if somebody other than two live existences, in communication, are involved. Therein comes the language, the sound, and the script. The language of sounds has developed as phonetics, and the language of the written word with or without oral transmission is known as linguistics. The sophistication of these specializations has used the machine and technology to lend both credence and depth to the field of specialization.
The present understanding of digitalization needs to be more enriched while incorporating these ideas. However, the moot point remains that communication is central to existence. The more adept persons have incorporated music and rhythm into such communication, not to overlook the power of touch, which ranges from fingers to other parts of the body.
Accordingly, the study of communication needs to be enriched by the realization of the wide spectrum of its ambit. Many aspects of process are still to be explored in a deep scholastic mode. This alone will enable credible theories to emerge. This process will be a major contribution to the concerns of relationships.
Relationships and emotions are difficult to comprehend and manage because of various levels at which the exchange occurs. The mind is supposed to be affected by various kinds of waves, which have been identified as alpha waves, beta waves, and so on and so forth. This is not only the touch but also the rhythm and words which impact a response.
If someone is annoyed, the level and pitch of the voice is often raised. A common response to somebody's annoyance is a follow-up question, some what to the effect of 'Why are you annoyed?'
The truth is, one knows why the other person is annoyed. One is only waiting for a verbalization of the cause of annoyance. This act by itself may or may not help. In fact, unless sincerely intended, asking this question is questionable and indeed could have the effect of aggravating the situation.
For good communication, rhythmic synchronization of each other's moods is necessary. Usually, the opportunity for rhythmic understanding is disturbed by the different moods of the two or more persons involved in communication. In such circumstances, a change of topic, a change of tone, or even some humour may help in 'aiding' ease all-round.
The challenge is that in the heat of the moment, one loses track of the options for keeping the communication on track or simply persisting with one's perspective.
The message is simple: at all stages, one needs to keep one's calm, look at the options, and select wisely. This would help one to not only adjust better in communication but also help carry the other person along.
To do this, it is essential to realize that a major purpose of any communication is to be able to share one's own chosen facts in an appropriate tone and content, for the other person to hear. Similarly, to intertwine the communication, it is important to hear what the person is stating. A person who can read the other persons unstated wish to 'posture' can communicate better.
It is this complexity coupled with intangible simplicity that makes communication so much of an art and a skill beyond words. Deft negotiators know how to be flexible and accommodating to the other person's point of view.
There is also scope for emphasizing an assertion, but that is few and far between and has to be timed properly with chosen words, appropriate posture, accompanying softness, and suitable intonation in the voice or more.
At the end of the day, unless there are special circumstances, in most of communication to win, both must win. It is a rarity to have 'peace' if one wins and the other person loses. People generally do not like to accept defeat, which means that the apparent loser will bounce back in the communication and raise it again sooner or later. All in all, it is important to realize that communication, like all arts, must be gradually perfected. It also requires technological sensitivity. It requires choice of appropriate methods/medium such as the telephone, video, and more to relate with each other. In many cases, the choice of medium itself can convey a message. The art of communication is challenging and fascinating. There are many who are better than others in the practice of this art.
(The writer is a well-known management consultant of international repute; views expressed are personal)