Women achievers Dr Tessy Thomas, Twinkle Khanna, Ekta Kapoor, Namita Gokhale, Falguni Nayar, Bharati Chaturvedi, Dr Aarti Vij and Kamal Kumbhar expressed their views about barriers of women empowerment — self-censorship and tags that cloud their capabilities. By Kritika Dua
We may cry hoarse about women empowerment but recent data shows that India is lacking far behind in this respect and we are worse than neigbouring China and Bangladesh! According to last year’s gender gap statistics, India has dropped 21 spots when it comes to parity. Crimes against women have risen from 41.7 per cent to 53.9 per cent from 2011-15, according to the National Crimes Data Bureau. The female mortality rate is 17 per cent higher in comparison to males. literacy rate is 82 per cent for men and 65 per cent for women.
The toss-up of such alarming figures made for an invigorating discussion moderated by TV personality Shereen Bhan while coordinating a panel discussion at Ficci ladies Organisation (FlO). She said whatever women do is often self-censored and “that’s because we are constantly worried about how we will be judged. We seek external validation as that’s the kind of environment we have grown up in and are conditioned to think in this direction. In the quest to not stand out too much and to fit in, there is a lot of self-censorship.”
The moderator then asked writer-producer Twinkle Khanna how she negotiated the bends. The latter replied, “When I was growing up, what is politically incorrect right now to say, I was a tomboy. It was much later that I realised the way I developed my mind was an androgynous mind. Thus I don’t look at myself particularly as a woman. I don’t have a place in society as a woman but as a human being. I am not interested in appeasing anyone as I haven’t been trained to do that. It’s a short life and I want to leave the world in a better place than what I found it in and thoroughly entertain myself during that time.” She went on to add that she likes jokes and makes fun of everything, whether it is politics or social mores. The actress turned author gets into a lot of trouble for it but she seems to manage it well.
In contemporary times, celebs have to deal with a lot of pressure, be it for their sartorial choices or statements. Twinkle said, “The pressure is not only from social media but in the times we live in; there is pressure from everywhere, especially when one talks about things like politics or taboos. Sometimes, I wonder if I am on the right path or not. But my mother has always told me that the reason I am always spraining my leg is not due to the weak ligament but because I am always twisting my foot and putting it in my mouth.”
Sheeren went on to say that like Twinkle, TV czarina Ekta Kapoor hasn’t shied away from making bold choices which sometimes other people might not necessarily understand. She referred to her as a fiercely independent woman who stands up for what she believes in though people often confuse her real self with the narrative that she portrays on small screen. How then does she do justice to the characters which are difficult to identify with herselfIJ Said Ekta, “My journey has been quite a paradox as I make movies that deal with sex and TV shows that are based on the conservative mindset. Since both are two sides of the same coin, I deal with everything with a pinch of salt. I agree with Twinkle that life is short and one has to find humour in it. I am a feminist and on the surface these are extremely conservative stories but the protagonists are regular women in everyday India, trying to effect a change and break the mould. If one is wearing a sari, it doesn’t mean she can’t shoot the gun or run an office, something which people fail to see. I think a lot of women expect me to conform as I do a lot of socially conservative television and they get quite a shock when they meet me.” Ekta started producing family shows at the age of 24 and films like lipstick Under My Burkha at 42. “I don’t want to be put in a box and as women we should realise it and unbox ourselves.” Ekta made a valid point that women have been played up against each other many a time. “Women compare more than men. The moment we start accepting each other and start relating with each other’s stories, things will change.”
Writer, publisher and festival director Namita Gokhale explained Ekta’s observation. “In our patriarchal society, women are not encouraged to think for themselves and thus it’s very easy to get into the obvious boxes or traps Ekta is talking about. It’s because we box ourselves, in that we get boxed.” She is not in favour of women-centric discourses as we often forget that we are only half the human race. Thus, there is a need to take ourselves forward as species.
Founder and CEO at Nykaa.com Falguni Nayar said, “It’s very easy to mock women on their fashion choices, putting them in a place where it’s easier to deal with. And women do seem to do that to other women. These are the kind of stories we come across on television which encourages us to take the easy routes. The trivialisations of women’s issues is more sinister and more thought out than we think.”
Falguni believes that women should be recognised for who they are. “A woman should be an actress of her life. Today, women want more equality in all fields of life. Why should I be recognised as a woman entrepreneurIJ I would rather prefer to be recognised for entrepreneurship. That’s true for everyone here.” There are a lot of men who vote for women leaders and her firm has a good number of men working alongside women. She added that it shouldn’t be about women guiding women but about men too.
Scientist and project director for Agni-IV missile at DRDO Dr Tessy Thomas said, “Science doesn’t discriminate on the basis of gender. Over the years, I have observed that girls are taking up science stream in a larger number, though this field is slightly challenging. But they should self-motivate themselves.”
Dr Tessy informed us that in the professional space, the late President APJ Abdul Kalam was the one who motivated her. Her mother wanted Tessy and her siblings to attain quality education and be independent. “Education makes a lot of difference for women. In organisations like ISRO and DRDO, knowledge matters and not the gender. At DRDO, many missions are being led by women. There should be self-determination to choose what you want to be.”
Women are also victims of environmental injustice. Chintan’s director Bharati Chaturvedi said, “There is environmental degradation and the huge gap between the rich and poor in our country. Women bear the brunt of environmental degradation as the harmful elements in plastics can cause breast cancer.” Her NGO works in skill development of women who are ragpickers by helping them recycle the waste which creates an outlet for income.
Dr Aarti Vij is professor of hospital administration of Cardiothoracic and Neurosciences Hospital at AIIMS. She also serves as the head of the Organ Retrieval Banking Organisation (ORBO), as part of which she has seen many women being forced to become organ donors. “Women are super human beings. I don’t believe in gender discrimination, it’s in the psyche and not in the society. The qualities that women need to succeed in their respective fields are honesty, dedication and perseverance.” Dr Aarti believes that there should be harmony in their career, they should aim at getting their family and friends on board to support them. Thus, it will be easier for them to focus on work and excel in it. She herself has done it with her husband and children and feels that women alone can raise awareness levels of men.
Kamal Kumbhar spoke at length about her unique journey and how she became an entrepreneur. Kamal was born in Osmanabad, Maharashtra to a daily-wage labourer and lived in absolute poverty. After a failed marriage, she was financially vulnerable. However, she fought against the odds to start a business venture and is now providing livelihood opportunities to thousands of women like her. Kamal started Kamal Poultry and Ekta Producer Company in 1998 with no knowledge of business or marketing, with a meagre sum of Rs 2,000. And later shifted to sari and other items. Twenty years later, she has ventured into ten businesses which bring in about Rs 7 lakh every month. Apart from that, she has mentored more than 5,000 women from her state to set up similar enterprises and become self-sufficient.
In the end, it was left to Khanna to round off matters heavy with her own brand of wit. On the adjustments that women make in their family life, she said: “The problem is that women have been bending over backward in order to move forward. We are constantly doing that and it is time that we stop. look at what has been happening in all our lives. Whether we are working or stay-at-home women, child-raising seems to be only a woman’s job. We spend 10 years of our lives running to the school, sending their lunch boxes, dressing them as dracula, Hanuman... Why should it be just a woman’s jobIJ Where are the menIJ Unless they are off fighting wars, they better be there too.”