After playing trend-turning roles and delivering blockbusters consecutively, Kangana Ranaut feels her role in Katti Batti is the most challenging emotionally. In a freewheeling chat with RINKU GHOSH, she reveals her spiritual side that has boosted her confidence and helped her become one with her characters. She talks about pay parity, yoga, why she doesn’t endorse fairness brands or do item numbers
Tell us about Katti Batti and why you chose to work on it. How is this role, given the bar you have already set for yourself, a notch higher or lowerIJ
It is definitely a notch higher. It is so hard to define where this character goes and what she does during the film’s promotions because she indeed is the mystery. See, the film is also like a thriller and somewhere my character, Payal, makes a dramatic revelation that changes the course of events. I feel that the marketing team should have cut a few promos and given a little hint about the intensity of the film. The makers have a point that they cannot let go of the big revelation but rather build up to it. But people are literally assuming it to be a relationship-based film. The truth is that the live-in relationship is there for only three minutes in the film and that too plays out through a song. You could say the story picks up from where the promos leave you.
In the present time, this guy is looking for a girl whom he lost. He does not know where she is, what she does or how to find her. And we keep going back and forth as his past reveals truths and gives different clues about this woman. Sometimes you feel that she loved him madly, at other times, he seems a jerk. Then there are times when you doubt whether this girl really exists. So, the audience will get these different clues that unfold, and like in every thriller, build to a climax.
As a character, Payal has been very overwhelming and at the same time, very intense too. I usually do not cry when I watch films and I hate to do so because when I get into a trough, I cannot come out of it very easily. I remember I would just cry every night after finishing my shoot and then my mother would have to come over and I even cried with her, thinking about so many profundities. If I could cry, then everyone else will cry.
Also, this character is very hard-hitting and tragedy-stricken. I took it up as a big challenge, saying I would be the best I could be. But when I internalised her, I realised that it was the most dangerous thing an actor could do to oneself — probe the way the character is and what she experiences. I was affected and moved, so much that it scarred me somewhat and left impressions that I don’t think I will recover from. It has changed me forever, scared me about another reality which we are completely oblivious to. I really hope that God is kind and I do not get to play such an intense character soon.
Is Payal more layered than Datto (Tanu Weds Manu Returns) and Rani (Queen)IJ
Yes, very much and I’ll never get to play such a character in my whole life. Katti Batti is going to be very cathartic for people who like larger-than-life love stories like The Notebook, Kal Ho Naa Ho or Titanic, which leave you lost but don’t leave you with the feeling of being lost.
Did you know that the character would be so intense when you signed up for itIJ
Yes. But I did not know that the technique I had acquired as an actor would affect me like this. I usually go into method. But now I think you should not adopt method to such characters because they can scare you as a human being.
Do these characters and human emotions stay in your head long after the film has releasedIJ How do you deal with thatIJ How much of self-distancing can you doIJ
Well, the thing is that with someone like Datto or Rani, they do not expose that ruthlessness of life to you. Their issues are different — of some guy whom they could not marry, of some aspiration and expectation that weren’t met. But Payal’s life is a little too harsh and when that side is revealed to you, it can make you pessimistic. So, I really would not want to deal with characters like that in my life again.
I am a very sensitive person. So after playing a character I may tell myself, “I am over it” or “I did my meditation,” but I would not know in what way she would manifest in me and when. No matter what you say, these characters have been part of your experience. So, it is very difficult to dissociate clinically.
How would you define your acting — is it instinctive or rehearsedIJ What is your personal definitionIJ
I take a very spiritual route to my characters. I obviously acquire all the material I can for reference but I need to know her destiny. I believe in this simple philosophy — never believe people but see their actions because their actions reveal their character. And that leads to their destiny which they have no control over. But they have control over their actions which they unknowingly call on for their destiny. So I take the story and penetrate it through the actions of characters.
With Datto, I discovered her swagger and walking style. It demonstrated she was an overconfident person. She was someone who didn’t believe what life told her. When Tanu’s friend alerted her, “Can’t you see, the man is drawn towards his wife,” she dismissed her fears because she would see only what she wanted to. That’s what made her character flawed. When she did come to terms with it, she convinced herself to face it. I gave Tanu insecurities even though she was pretty and Datto, the mind, though she was not pretty at all. So nobody with predictable or let’s say a little less understanding of life would take these characters and give them these flaws. But look at their destinies. So I like to play with my characters in a very spiritual way. I have done the same thing with Payal as well.
I am a very spiritual person and my approach to acting reflects that. I do a lot of yoga, meditation and I think most acting schools encourage breathing exercises. Someday, I would like to open an acting school and teach how to be spiritually one with your character.
Do you research for your characters because they appear clearly defined in your mind now that you have done Queen, Tanu Weds Manu Returns and Katti Batti almost back to backIJ
I do as much research as I can and have been most fortunate that each character has come my way at a time when I have felt, “Now is the time when I need this and I can do this,” as opposed to feeling a little premature about it.
like I feel I was a kid when I played a schizophrenic in Woh lamhe. I did not understand the depth of the condition and mistook it to be madness. Today, I am in the company of creative people who know more about such mental illnesses. I know a lot of people who are bipolar, who suffer from schizophrenia and depression, which is a very common trait in the industry. I read a few surveys which state that creative people naturally tend to think more and think about their very thoughts too. This process of intense rumination and an enhanced, wider understanding make them depressive at times. You must have heard about the story where king Janaka tells his guru that he has seen a dream where he is a beggar. He asks whether he is a king dreaming of being a beggar or whether he is a beggar dreaming of becoming a king. This philosophy of delusion is so beautiful because the same situation can be seen by two people and interpreted in two different ways. The delusional world of the schizophrenic or bipolar is so tender and beautiful. I think it can make a human heart bleed if depicted in the right way. But I couldn’t relate to it and did not handle that character well. Now I regret losing that opportunity and hope somebody gives me a second chance. I am much more confident and understanding now. Half the battle as an actor is won when you feel, “Yes, I know this kid.”
What was your earliest film inspiration that gave you the courage to rebel against your family, run away from home and hold on despite early failures and stereotypesIJ
It is a combination of many things that I grew up with but I think that my own work has inspired me the most. After every role I tell myself, “Oh my God, I could do that.” So it gives you a certain confidence and then you work on it.
Initially in the industry, I felt like my character in Gangster, when I am on the terrace crying with Emraan Hashmi. I was quite an introvert and complex because as a kid I did not have many things to be proud of or with which I could build my self-esteem. I felt inadequate all the time. If I had a little string of hope, others would make me nervous. The beautiful women, winners of beauty pageants, supermodels, larger-than-life images and so on — everyone’s work made me nervous. And when I came back home, disheartened, I didn’t have parents by my side, who could have reassured me.
So, I think my own work encouraged me and I somehow found a silver lining in all of them. But it was in Queen that I found a different confidence. I would give a lot of credit for this to Vikas (Bahl, the director of the film) and the cast because they gave me the liberty to experiment with the character the way I wanted. It polished my understanding abilities. Sometimes it happens that you sit down and think of the things you want to do and contribute to the film but you don’t have the courage to approach the director. But Vikas just let me fly. It was one of those rare moments when you give someone a platform and then step aside.
He was very confident about your talent...
I believe that a director’s confidence is all that an artiste needs and I wish, hope and pray that the day I become a director, this is how my actors feel about me. He made me feel that I could do no wrong and no damage, he is that great a person and a director.
Do you think the perception shaped by industry lobbies or film families has changed towards you, an outsiderIJ
Yes. Now they treat me well. The thing that hurt me most in my early days in the industry was the way they looked at me, as a woman of no consequence, although I believed that I was a good actor and had all the elements to make it big. Women are indeed treated badly. They are defined by the male gaze. The mentality is that even after she becomes a top actress, she won’t have much value, she will always be dependent on a big hero. But after my journey, people won’t dismiss them casually. Tomorrow if they see someone struggling like me, they would stop and think for a moment before being mean to her and probably wonder, “What if she becomes another Kangana Ranaut and refuses to work with meIJ Even if I get the biggest stars of the industry, she will not.” So they should think twice about treating that little girl like a trash can, saying, “What damage can you cause meIJ”
These are the same people who turn around and talk to male actors in a different manner. They have multiple faces. What hurt me most about my struggle is that they had kept the ugliest face for a struggling girl, asking, “Even if you make it, how far will you goIJ” That was very mean.
This is a male chauvinist society. So many times I was told, “You cannot talk like that or behave like this, you should listen to guys and that you have a shelf life of two years.” It is assumed that if women actors want to make it big, they have to come with some security net of a boyfriend or a father... something. They can’t do it on their own because it is so hard to be in this world where such evil people live.
Do you think we can ever have women actors like Meryl Streep, who has managed to play a rockstar pulling a film at this ageIJ
Yes we can. And for that you need to be respected. That is why I do not endorse fairness creams. There are women who also encourage society to love them for the wrong reasons. Why should I be loved for something so superficial like my body, my colour or my curlsIJ It is for the same reason that I never do item numbers. And people tell me that the crowd and people out there identify with me at a spiritual level. I want to play this 60-year-old woman with grey hair, age with grace. I wish to be complete and I am not disposable. I just want to be treated as an equal.
You are also one of the few women actors who have spoken about revising payscales in the industry. How has that gone downIJ
let me illustrate with an example. Tanu Weds Manu is one of the biggest blockbusters of all time but I did not get that kind of salary. Now with consecutive successes, I admit to have hiked my fees, which I could not do before. With each film, I want to come to that point where I should be treated as an equal. People do not realise it but every time I finish a film, I am a year older. So, it’s not that I have more than 365 days to have a set of experiences and depict a single character. Today I played Datto, tomorrow I won’t be able to. Not that I can’t but I won’t. Why would I risk similarity as a performerIJ I would want to grow and diversify with other characters. I have as much time as a hero has on screen. So why is my time treated like it means nothingIJ Why is it that my abilities and my hard work as an individual are treated like they can be bought in peanutsIJ That’s what I don’t like about this industry.
Do you think women actors also highlight their externalities to stay in the game and don’t join hands for so serious an issueIJ
With a few of us standing up, there has been a general awareness of what we need to do. But women must understand that if they want respect, they should first respect themselves. They should let go of their attention-seeking mentality and avoid silly competitions, like if this one is talking about one date, then I will talk about one vacation. lastly, all of us have to stop product endorsements about fairness, no matter what the amount of money offered.
Is that why you choose to do affordable brands for young women, like a certain brand of eyewearIJ
Many have liked the campaign. I have incorporated funky elements like cat eyes and the creatives were very cooperative. I think women need to understand that this society and film industry put pressure on us, ye karo vo karo, get botoxed and all such nonsense. Does anybody care if a hero turns 50 or looks soIJ We still love them, don’t weIJ Yet for a woman, even a little wrinkle or a strand of grey hair is pounced upon. Just let it be, natural toh hai. That’s why I make sure that my characters are raw. Datto is sans make-up with buck teeth. So is Rani. I like raw characters because not just women, even men relate to them. They see their daughters and sisters in them. This despite the fact that this same audience is conditioned daily by television images that tell you if you do not have gloss or the desired waist size, then you are not a woman.
You won’t believe, so many women came up to me and said after their husbands watched Queen, their relationship and equation had changed. You look down upon a woman in a flimsy role but when she is the central character, you start understanding the wife and the mother, and their values. That’s what makes me really happy.
When are you directing your filmIJ We have been told you have taken a very active interest in the craft of film-making, done script-writing courses in between...
I would want to step out more into the domain of being an independent woman. I wouldn’t want to colour my hair or go for botox when I am ageing. I can work on my creative energy in production or writing, but I want dignity as a woman who is respected despite her age and looks, and known for her grace. It’s heartbreaking to see people wanting to cling on to a year that has passed by. I too hated birthdays at 18 and 23. But now that I am 28, I feel so good, sorted and balanced. I like the fact that I am not reckless, confused or anxious anymore. With years, life gets better, so do not pretend to be 18.
Who is that woman in the Indian film industry you look up toIJ
I have been very impressed by Sridevi and thank god she is not my contemporary. I think she is unbelievable. Today, I am confident and self-assured because I know kya hai market mein. Had Sridevi been my contemporary, I wouldn’t have achieved what I have achieved. My confidence would have died long ago because she simply would be the best and who would want to fight for second placeIJ In Mr India, she defined sensuality in a sari as part of the erotic song Kaate nahi kat te. No sequence can replicate that oomph.
I cannot do the Charlie Chaplin act she did. She would laugh and cry in a moment, taking us along with her in one sweep. There was something so innocent about her, from her voice to her baby face to her full feminine body. There is no match for Sridevi. She is flesh and blood. And Sadma came so far ahead of Queen. She carried the audience even with her vulnerability. I am making my bread and butter only because she is not around that much, nahi toh kabka...(laughs).