Feelings can make or break us. It is, therefore, paramount to manage them in the right way, says Kanchan Rai

Emotional repression is directly connected to emotional expression. It is subliminal. The subconscious repression of emotions for a prolonged period may result in difficulty to express your emotions. It happens when we protect ourselves from untoward events and the emotions attached to them.

Being uncomfortable either listening to others' feelings or sharing ours, numbness, and not letting yourself evaluate distressing emotions are some of the signs of emotional repression. Emotions can make or break us. It is, therefore, paramount to manage them in the right way. It is also equally important to understand the difference between repressed and suppressed emotions. Suppressed emotions are feelings that we knowingly avoid. This is maybe because we do not know how to deal with them, or, could be a short-term solution to focus on imminent tasks on priority. Emotional suppression can be good at times, as long as we decide to address those emotions soon without delay. Repressed emotions, on the other hand, as they do not get a chance to be processed, might well-up to become a range of psychological or physical symptoms.

Emotional repression is often an outcome of childhood experiences. Learning that it is possibly much safer to avoid distressing and painful emotions in childhood leads to burying strong emotions even as an adult without even realising it. Mostly, these are emotions that we consider bad or believe that other people might judge after revealing. This brings us closer to positive emotions that are in general accepted by others as it might seem easier to express them. But this isn't the case for everyone dealing with emotional repression.

Dealing with emotions requires self-awareness. We should know how our emotions function, how we should manage them, how does each emotion play a different role and shape our lives. It sounds like a lot to be figured out, but it can be done following basic yet effective solutions. Some of them are mentioned below:

Clarity: Name your emotions for more clarity so that we know how we are feeling, and what could be the possible cause of it. If we know that our emotion is subjected to certain conditions, say, for example, we are lonely or under stress, it will help us to deal with our emotions effectively. 

Acceptance: Now that we have clarity about our emotions, it is time to accept and acknowledge that these emotions exist in our lives as a result of our experiences or the surrounding environment. Denying their existence won't make them go away.

Sharing: Share what you are experiencing. When you let your friends and family know who you feel, it will provide relief to a great deal. You will not be all alone in the fight. If sharing feelings to people seems like a bit too much, then try writing about how you feel. It will let you identify your own emotional experiences.

Seek professional help: Even if after trying the above-mentioned solutions, you still feel overwhelmed as the result of emotional repression, seek mental health professional's help. It will give you the strength to dig and address discomforting emotions that will help you feel better and do good for you in the long run. 

Those who have difficulty in accessing and understanding their emotions and memories over a long-time struggle to enjoy a meaningful life. From their personal relations to their professional life, from their behaviour to their mood on a day-to-day basis, emotional repression affects individuals in multiple ways. Therefore, the need to work towards identifying and managing emotions become a significant and immediate step to a mentally healthy life.

(The author is a mental, emotional wellbeing coach and founder of Let Us Talk, which provides therapy sessions to improve mental health.)