All-women trips are trending these days. But are all women ready to pick up their bags and leave tension free for that well-deserved breakIJ Experts tell Deebashree Mohanty that guilt trips are a woman problem and the sooner they address it, the better life is going to be for them
Geeta Subramanium took four weeks to finally give her nod to an all-girls trip that her best friends were organising. After a lot of discussion and mulling over many destinations, the women had zeroed in on Kerala and places around. Seven women, 15 days and 1,700 km was the plan. Everything was ticked off the checklist — children put up at their respective grandparents’ place, bais were told to behave and come on time because saheb’s tiffin had to be ready before dawn, provisions bought and stored — everything, absolutely everything had to be planned a month in advance.
“We had a travel agent taking care of all the bookings for us. Apart from hiccups related to the trip itself, there were many of us who were on a guilt trip. Husbands were outraged about their wives taking off alone, children were not too happy about being excluded from this outing and then there were office colleagues who were surprised that we were going on an all-girl trip. Some of my men friends also enquired ‘is your husband okay with this’IJ,” Aastha Goradia, 43-year-old software professional and leader of this girlie gang recalls. It’s been a year-and-a-half since that trip down south but Goradia feels that nothing can ever come close to the fun they had on that one trip.
Of course, there were mood swings during the trip and repercussions later, but the women still share a laugh when either one of them puts up pictures of that trip on any social networking website. “Before that trip, I had never left my husband and children (two sons, Akshay 13 and Adiva, 4) for so long to indulge in something all my own. Although my husband Pritam was supportive and helped in making the bookings, I knew he was not too happy about the duration of the trip. He kept insisting that the entire package could become cheaper if we went for a week and not extend it. And then there was the fallen faces of my children. I was almost going to say no,” Subramanium recalls.
There are many like Subramanium who have compromised on fun to make themselves available for family outings alone. It is not bad to go with family, they say, but given a choice they would not mind going on an all-woman trip. “With children, it is almost impossible to get time out. In an outing with children, the mother hardly gets time to enjoy the trip. Also why can’t we have some time to ourselves without the husbandIJ” queries Shanti Juneja, founder of an all-woman group called singlereadytomingle.com.
Up and running since 2010, her portal organises women-only seminars, functions and travel trips. Although Juneja tells you that the number of women opting for these trips is few, the trend is catching up. “Give it a few years and all-woman trips will be trending,” Juneja says, adding that in 2012, her company had organised such trips for two parties during the summer months.
A recent survey by the world’s largest travel site TripAdvisor shows that woman trips are peaking — among women that travel alone, 41 per cent respondents said they actually enjoyed travelling alone for work. To add to that, a whopping 76 per cent said they enjoy going solo on holiday. And lack of company is definitely not a complaint.
In fact, majority of the respondents in the survey (58 per cent) said their biggest incentive for solo vacations was that they could do all the things they want without having to worry about what someone else wants. Thirtyfour per cent women indicated they loved travelling alone as it was adventurous and exciting. Another 32 per cent claimed that the thrill of managing everything by themselves was a motivator as well.
“Another interesting insight highlighting the opportunity for the hospitality sector is that 78 per cent respondents said they would prefer to stay in an all-woman’s hotel or on a woman-exclusive floor in a hotel, when travelling alone,” Nikhil Ganju country manager, TripAdvisor says. He adds that while security still remains a major concern for women travellers, they are willing to explore and experiment with new ‘safe’ places. In the survey by this very website, Bangalore and Kerala are preferred destinations for all-woman travellers.
While the younger lot is on a guilt trip, the senior citizens admit that they prefer an all-woman vacation. “Why should my husband feel left outIJ He can take care of himself very well. The staff is in place and everything is arranged for before hand. He is encouraging that we women form a group to go on trips. The last trip that we (six friends and relatives) had taken was a couple of months back when we booked into an ashram in Haridwar. It was a very enriching experience. We all enjoyed the stay thoroughly,” 60-year-old Sudha Saxena, says. However, she is slightly upset that she couldn’t make it to the current trip the group is taking to Kathmandu. “I have my navaratra puja so I couldn’t leave but the rest of them are very excited,” she tells you.
Experts tell you that this thing about the ‘guilt trip’ is a woman’s problem alone and that she needs to address it at the earliest.
“Many women are still not open to the idea of hanging out without their husband and children. They are in a particular mould. This is not the age of dependency any way. The moment a woman feels she needs a break from the routine, that’s usually the time she needs to go on one. It is not as if she is abandoning her family or not doing her job as a mother or a wife or a daughter-in-law. She is also a human being who might need a break,” Shikha Dhawani, a family therapist, says. She feels that women who prefer to go on a trip alone are usually from the metros.
Celeb travel
Bestie trip ever
The best girly vacation I took was to New York with my sister and my best friend. It was the last memorable vacation. We spent all our time shopping and eating out. I loved the cupcakes from the world famous bakery Magnolia and spent most days shopping on 5th Avenue. Not to be forgotten are the awesome clubs we visited as also theatre productions —Roshni Chopra, presenter and TV actress
North-east fun
I have been on many girly vacations but the one I cherish the most is the trip that I had taken to the North-east with my four girl friends. It was amazing. Right from the steaming momos in Gangtok to the frozen lakes near Kanchanjunga mountains, we explored mystical side of India and we loved being just by ourselves —Manasi Parekh Gohil, TV actress
Go Goa gone
I had gone to Goa with my girl gang last year and we had such a blast, an experience I can’t forget. Although I had jaundice at that time, we made sure we had loads of fun on that trip.— Aishwarya Sakhuja, actress