A couple in their mid-50s came asking one day: “How fast can we have a house in our own nameIJ” “You already live in a beautiful house. Why then are you in such a hurry to own a houseIJ” I countered. “That’s my father’s house”. He responded. “But then you happen to be the only child of your parents. Are they pushing you out of their houseIJ” I questioned. “Absolutely not. But then we will be able to live at our own terms in self-owned house. It is very difficult to get along with them. They don’t appreciate my concerns, and unnecessarily keep discouraging me from working on any ambitious plan that I wish to undertake. I feel let down,” he averred.
While this dialogue was on, I was scanning his astrological chart, to find that the root of all the problems rested with the questioner’s inflated ego. When pointed out, the man countered: “I don’t have ego. Tell me, if I don’t deserve to take care of my self-esteem.” Well, that’s your perception. I knew, it was difficult for his egotistical mind to digest my counsel. So, to make him understand, I deliberated upon some of his life trends that he had not shared with me.
Elaborating, I told him that with Mars in the 9th house, his father seems to be a strict disciplinarian. He would have tried to enforce discipline while bringing his son up. In that spirit, he could have taken stern measures, whenever his son was found wanting in his behaviour. And as a sensitive child, looking for love and keen to be handled playfully, more than been put through austerities, the son would not have taken it kindly. He would have been subjected to such harsh measures starting close to the fifth year of his life. So, he had a difficult childhood.
All these unpleasant reminiscences of early childhood have, in fact, made a dent in your mind and psyche, which is playing out now to your detriment. For, as a child, it was difficult for you to understand that no matter how strict your father was with you, his intent was doing good to you.
He would have done that in his unrest desire to rear you up in a way that you later prove to be a successful person in your own right. Not to say anything on your father’s flawed approach, which is not relevant anymore, given your present age, you were expected to be matured enough to get over such a hang by now. Remember, mystical are the ways of development of one’s mind and psyche. What one meets through during early childhood, their impressions get registered deep in the inner realms of one’s mind.
These imprints, in fact, form the premise on which, one’s mind and psyche take off. The irony, of the whole situation is that one would not know, why s/he would be behaving a particular way, because that has already become a part of one’s habit tendency. But these childhood reminiscences keep chasing from within till consciously identified, acknowledge, and resolved.
The fact that the man grew with the feeling that his worth was being questioned by his father on each and every count, it bred in a sense of identity crisis in him, as would Sun placed opposite Saturn, both debilitated, imply. His egotistical mind further compounds his problem.
For, ego expands whatever it comes across, whether good or bad. Identifying itself with his indwelling memory imprints, his ego inadvertently makes him crazy about proving right on each and every count, as if the man would be all-knowing. He habitually doubt’s his father’s intent, if ever the latter comes out with his point of view, and his advisories even all the more, without any due diligence. So, instinctively, the man comes out with counter-logic, not necessarily reasoned. And, if the father tries to explain his stand, the man loses his sense of control, and becomes wild. It so happens because, the man is born in a fiery lagna, its lord Mars, locking horns with expansive Jupiter, intelligence signifying Mercury, and mind indicator Moon.
This, in the first place accounts for his impulsive, irritable, aggressive, domineering nature, who would wish to be in control of things. Second, he has a suspicious mind, and overcritical of others. Such a deep analysis left the man dumbfounded. He then was left with no scope for contesting my counsel anymore. So, he readily agreed to follow the process suggested to overcome his fault lines.
The writer is an astrologer, vastu consultant and spiritual counsellor. Write to him at G-102, Bharat Nagar, New Friends Colony, New Delhi-110025 Tel: 9818037273 Email: pioneerqueries@bharatastro.com Website: www.bharatastro.com