Trying to maintain balance between giving children relevant information and oversharing is no easy task. The best way to guide them in life is to set the right examples for them, explains AJIT KUMAR BISHNOI
As a parent, you have been given an enormous responsibility because a soul’s future has been entrusted to you to a large extent. Yes, every soul brings his or her fate with him or her but a parent is a medium to facilitate that. Every parent is expected to do their best for their children. But what is the best possible way to do soIJ lead by example. For this, all parents must try to be on ideal behaviour. If you have bad habits, you will most likely be unable to discipline your ward(s). A child will instinctively remind you of your faults. Then, you will have no moral authority to enforce discipline. You will be sowing seeds of whatever bad habits you have, in your child.
let us start from the beginning. When a child is due, create an environment of godliness in your home. This creates an impression which lasts throughout their lives because this is the first impression. As souls, love is the best gift one can give to one another. Never let them feel that they are a burden on you. Remember, they didn’t ask to be born in your family. Yes, life is tough but try to insulate a growing child from the harsh realities of the world by absorbing them in order to prevent the psyche of your children from getting negatively affected. There will be a time to expose a child to them but that should come when they are grown up enough.
Early childhood is meant to teach good sanskars or moral values. Don’t ever encourage stupidity as some parents foolishly do to have a laugh. This becomes a habit, which hurts the child in the long run. Accept their just demands if they can be met otherwise explain patiently why you are unable to do so. Every child must understand the importance of money and why it must never be frittered away.
In order to do all this, you need to spend quality time with your offspring. You must become their friends sooner than later. Each child is a unique package and is never an extension of their parents. Many forget this fact and try to impose their desires and goals on their children and overburden them. All children must be given space. One has to be very tolerant. Their uniqueness may sometimes bother us but that has to be accepted. Children are family members and there is no boss and employee relationship; it is a special coming together of different souls. Always listen to them with patience and reply with carefully chosen words. You don’t want to damage your relationship. Reward your children when they do something nice. This will encourage them to be good. Still, discipline if not combined with love will fail. Encourage your children to have hobbies of their choice. let them experiment to find out what they like. This involves some physical exertion on your part but that must be done.
Make them aware of their bodies gradually in order to make them wise. They should never learn these things from their peers; who are most likely to be misinformed. This is parents’ duty more than that of teachers in schools, because this matter is very delicate. Similarly, make them aware of the outer world gradually. Ask them questions as a way of teaching. However, don’t involve them in discussions for which they are not yet ready. Time will come for that later. And lastly, make sure that they get connected and stay connected with God; they will get everything desirable from God and will be able to lead a quality life.
Bishnoi is a spiritual writer and can be reached at spiritual@ajitbishnoi.com