The reality is that we are never alone because God is omnipresent. Hence, there is no question of being lonely if we strike a friendship with God, says AJIT KUMAR BISHNOI
If the answer is yes, the following may help overcome this very common problem when single occupancy is becoming quite common. Not everyone wants it but circumstances force it on some. It is a worldwide phenomenon, and is more pronounced in the elderly/retired persons, who have lost their spouses or are divorced from their life partners, and have not remarried. The genesis of this lies in the concept of nuclear family. I am not condemning this concept because it has many advantages, but one thing it definitely does is that it leaves some people all by themselves, especially in old age when children have gone away.
It does not matter how one finds himself or herself all by himself or herself and is unable to adjust to it, this matter has to be addressed if one feels lonely. Everyone living by himself or herself is not lonely; some enjoy the privacy. Spiritualists love it, but this is not true for all; only advanced ones may prefer it. Human beings have been called social animals and are meant to live in families.
The first and foremost antidote is to increase the number of physical activities as far as possible, and stagger them suitably such that there is always something to look forward to. This has to be entirely personal and the only suggestion I can make is to devote more time to exercises. This will not only help in countering loneliness but will also help in maintaining health. Not being healthy becomes a curse if one is living by himself or herself. The mood of “not this, not this” has to be given up. If we restrict ourselves too much, we end up choking ourselves. One has to try to find newer and newer ways to enjoy life. I hope I am not encouraging wrong ways in the name of newer ways.
Unfortunately, this is what a large percentage end up doing when they are lonely. Then, one will have another problem to deal with in not a very distant future.
The modern man is becoming increasingly lonely because we hate to share our space with others. In apartment blocks, it is not unusual that occupants of apartments facing one another remain strangers. Should we be that reservedIJ No, it hurts. How can we assume that others will not suit usIJ Have we tried and failedIJ The conclusion is: We have to open ourselves more and become friends with more than one or two we may have, if any.
The other extreme is being always surrounded by friends. I know a person who was escorted by 12 persons in three cars to the hospital, where he was to be operated for a heart problem. Poor fellow, he could not have friends giving him company in the ICU where he was stuck for a few days. He would have really felt bad, especially with bodily pains and restrictions and thus being forced to be alone. One should learn to live with himself or herself. It is impossible to have company all the time, for example when one is travelling long distance on a plane all by oneself.
The next solution is on the same lines. One should become friends with one’s own mind. Many people have difficulty in doing so. That is the reason they are forever looking for distractions like television, switching it on as soon as they enter home. The mind becomes friendly when one channelises one’s thoughts. Why think of problems all the timeIJ Why not reminiscence about things which gave you a lot of satisfaction; something nice which happened unexpectedlyIJ
Though the word loneliness is defined as being unhappy because one has no friends or people to talk to, but the reality is that we are never alone. Is God not omnipresentIJ So where is the question of being lonely if we strike a friendship with GodIJ It is not very difficult because God has already declared his friendship for us. (Bhagavad Gita 5.29) I talk to God all the time. Yes, it is a monologue, but it is very nice.
Bishnoi is a spiritual writer and can be reached at spiritual@ajitbishnoi.com