The smart negotiator always leaves the possibility to add an explanation, if things don't work out according to his or the other person’s liking
For those who spend a part of their evening looking at the different news channels, the overall impact of any panel discussion remains open to question. Shouting, unrelated reasoning, rearing to says one's bit without even caring to understand what the other person is saying are some hallmarks.
Unfortunately, this malaise is spreading and some who editorially organise either the electronics media or the printed word are asking for customised writing. The assumption seems to be that the more provocative it is, the more attention-grabbing it shall be. This situation needs no comment.
After all, ‘dialogue' is the framework of a communication. Communication means the ability to understand what the other person is saying and to say your bit in agreement, in modification of the other person's point of view, to build upon what the other person says and indeed clarify one's perception. This is meant to encourage the other person to do the same. There is mutuality. It can be called an aspect of negotiation.
Any negotiation has a verbal behaviour, non-verbal communication, and presumably there is some exchange of information. This involves participating constructively and allowing others to participate equally constructively. For this, some approaches work better than others. Indeed, it may be argued that this kind of negotiation is a step-by-step process. Missing a step may cause setbacks. It is equally important also to know what must not be said in a negotiation.
Consider a family situation where the husband and wife are animatedly discussing something — call it negotiation if you will. Making a disparaging remark about the parents’ of your spouse is precisely the sort of thing which should never be done. It has a huge potential of derailing the entire conversation, igniting emotions and then beginning a spiral which is difficult to control.
In a business negotiation, the same kind of effect will take place if you belittle the other person, throw slight on that person’s credentials. Perhaps the worst kind of thing to do in a negotiation is being abusive on one score or the other.
A little bit of care keeps any negotiation, dialogue or conversation on track. There are certain negotiations which take place face- to-face and certain others that are at times carried out electronically. That may not always be the best medium. In fact there is a view in management which says the medium is the message.
The location of the negotiation also matters. It can be at either party's location or at a third party location. It can be informal, formal, the possibilities are endless.
Before the meeting begins to roll, it is important to be clear on the objectives. Is it just to exploreIJ Generate ideasIJ Fact findingIJ Agreement on principlesIJ Problem solutionIJ Getting to the heart of a proposalIJ Assessing whether it meets the objectives of the funding agencyIJ The list can be added to.
It is pointless to go into such a meeting with the mind made up. It is best to let the outcome evolve. Even if one is clear on what one wants, it is best not to state it at the beginning.
Any negotiation is successful or otherwise if it is resilient enough to choose from many options which are always there. It can be anything between being competitive to collaborative.
Postures help. Admitting an error is always a good confidence-building measure provided the other person is not inclined to take a mean advantage of it.
If one is not sure, one should ask questions and confirm one's understanding of the position. If a concession helps to move towards a proper resolution of the conflict. It is best to let it evolve.
Aggressive statements framed definitively, are very good at alienating even the possibility of friendship. The smart negotiator always, leaves the possibility to add an explanation, if things don’t work out to his or the other person's liking. It helps to establish the bona fides. Put simply, negotiating in whatever manifestation is a craft. Perfection comes through practice. Our public figures, clearly can be ranked, according to their skill in this craft, as they display it, on the electronic media.
(The writer is senior managing director and principal economic advisor, Protiviti India Member Pvt ltd)