Why we fail at control: The Gita on surrender
We all wish to be in control, yet we fail repeatedly — and often miserably. The simple reason is that control never truly rests in our hands. Lord Krishna explains this with crystal clarity in the Bhagavad Gita: “The place of action, the doer, the instruments, the efforts, and providence-these five are the causes of all action.” (18.14) He adds, “Whatever action a person performs through body, speech, and mind, these five are its causes.” (18.15)
We are constantly acting-physically, verbally, and mentally. Speech and mind are mentioned separately in the Gita because they shape our lives more deeply than other senses. Consider a simple accident where both parties are at fault. If both apologise, the matter ends peacefully. If harsh words are exchanged, a brawl erupts.
The mind’s influence is even subtler: it colours our reactions, directs our moods, and silently writes our destiny. Thus, the mind and speech hold a special place among the instruments of action. What are these five causes?
First, the place of action: the circumstances we are placed in. Whether we are in burning Delhi in June or freezing Toronto in January, whether we live in a nuclear family with a newborn or in a bustling joint family-circumstances shape our actions, yet we do not choose them.
Second, the doer: we ourselves. But are we in control of our nature? Not really. Our inherent tendencies steer our responses. An irritable person will shout in the same situation where a calm person would forgive.
Third, the instruments: the tools we possess. Someone with a modern smartphone can perform tasks much faster than one with outdated technology. Our tools decide the quality of our output.
Fourth, the efforts: even effort is not fully ours. Health, energy, mood, and environment-countless factors determine how much effort we can actually put in.
And finally, providence: the results that unfold are shaped primarily by our past karmas. Whether something succeeds or fails often depends far less on our present labour and far more on the ledger of past actions. If all these factors are beyond our complete control, then how much control do we truly have? Not much. The only real controller, Krishna says, is God. All circumstances originate from Him, all instruments arise from His creation, and the fruits of action operate under His moral order. Even our free will exists within the boundaries of the divine system.
What, then, should we do? Krishna instructs: “In all respects, take shelter of Me alone. By My grace, you will achieve supreme peace and the eternal abode.” (18.62) Where Krishna and Arjuna stand together, the Gita promises opulence, victory, righteousness, and unwavering success. (18.78) Yet most of us resist surrender. Ego whispers: “I will succeed this time. I know better.” But Krishna warns: “You have a right only to action, never to its fruits.” (2.47) Those who try to predetermine outcomes, He says, are “pitiable.” (2.49) My own experience is no different. Whenever I try to control situations-especially in emotional matters such as a loved one’s illness-I find myself anxious and frustrated. Even when I pray sincerely, peace does not immediately follow. I still expect God to act according to my timeline. Slowly, I am learning that acceptance, not control, is the lesson; past karmas must play out, and God acts when the time is right. The journey from understanding to realisation is long. But the Gita assures us that surrender-not control — is where true freedom lies.
The writer is a spiritual teacher; views are personal
