“I am guilty … God has punished me for my decisions,” Radha Gobindo Pramanik whispered under his breath as he had a glance around the big hall of his house where preparations were on for a religious ritual. “Corona has taken away the people I loved the most. Now, I am all alone,” he said with eyes welling up.
A month-and-a-half back Pramanik, 71, had a happy family. His wife Mita was chirpy and they had a daughter, Navanita, who lived in Ghaziabad with her husband. The elderly couple were happy as they were planning to bring Navanita with a 7-month pregnancy from Ghaziabad. They wanted her first child in Lucknow. They had spoken to a doctor for an emergency, in case Navanita required medical help, and had shortlisted the city's top nursing homes for her admission.
“Mita was very happy about that because her daughter was going to have a baby after nine years of being married. She had all plans in place, from doctor to cook,” Pramanik said.
On April 2, a day before the couple went to Ghaziabad to bring their daughter to Lucknow, they threw a party at their home.
“A few days before the proposed party, my wife had a fever and a cough. I took her to a doctor who gave her some medicines. As her fever subsided, we thought it was a seasonal viral fever. Some of my friends suggested that we should get Covid test done. But I refused because I did not see any symptoms and her fever came down within a day,” Pramanik said. “On April 2, over 50 people came to our house. Mita greeted everyone and actively took part in the party. The next day, we left for Ghaziabad. My daughter was very happy to see us. The mother-daughter duo talked through the night. Mita explained to her the arrangements she had made in Lucknow for her delivery,” he said.
The next day, Mita’s fever returned. She was again taken to the same doctor. However, her condition deteriorated gradually and she died on April 6.
“As Mita always wanted Navanita’s first baby to be born in Lucknow, I brought my daughter and son-in-law to Lucknow. I was confident that I would manage because Mita had made all the arrangements. My daughter also wanted to stay with me,” Pramanik said.
On April 10, Navanita developed Covid symptoms and her sugar level shot up. She was taken to the doctor and was admitted to a nursing home. On April 18, she died.
“I lost my wife, my daughter and her unborn baby in a span of less than two weeks. I am left alone in this world now. Everyone I loved, left me alone,” Pramanik said.
“...when my wife died, I had some solace that my daughter was there. When she was coming with me, she told me that she would take care of me. She asked me not to worry. When I saw her body on the stretcher, her words that she would take care of me haunted me. She said I was not alone, but look, today I am alone,” he said.
“It is my fault. I should not have taken Mita to Ghaziabad. If we had not gone to our daughter’s house, she would have been alive. I am guilty … sometimes I feel I have killed my wife and daughter. This thought keeps me awake during the nights,” he said.