A young male and a female were desperate to be with each other just last year, as if it was difficult for them to live without one another. So, they rushed through their marriage ignoring their friend’s advice to spend some more time before they get officially hitched, so as to check whether their chemistry was workable. “We have found our true soul-mates, and therefore, there is no fun in unnecessarily delay in the marriage,” they responded. Just a year has passed and they have got into a fight to finish mode.
Now that the girl has moved back to her parents house, the boy misses her badly, realising how much he loves her. He also acknowledges how good her partner inherently is, but only after enough damage has been done to their relationship. The ground reality is that the situation seems to be slipping out of his hands. And even more so, since the girl’s parents have taken control of their child, and not allowing her any independent space to deal with her issues in her own way. So, what so strange happened that rocked their relationshipIJ
Well, when the two were passionately chasing each other, their focus was just on how to formalise the relationship so that they had unbridled access to each other. They did not feel the need to check upon other related factors, vital to a smooth run of marital life. Evidently, they never cared to take note of their attitudinal limitations and to identify and work upon them before they get married. Once they settled into marriage, their true nature came into full play. And the result is there to see.
Due to a sense of possession of each other, they began taking one another for granted. Both of them began trying to take control of each other as a matter of right. Domineering, impulsive, aggressive, and intolerant that both of them were, none was prepared to think over and relent, hence the disaster was imminent. What compounded the problem further was the girl’s parents’ undue interference in their day-to-day life.
This is not a solitary case. Of late, there has been a phenomenal rise of such cases. The irony of the whole situation is that the guy was made aware of his attitudinal limitations long before his marriage. He was warned that if he does not address them in time, it will impact his inter-personal relationships. He did not take the counsel seriously then and now he is looking for some remedial measure that could fix the problem quickly. He was categorically told that no extraneous method would serve any purpose. Both of them have to work upon their attitudes.
What is important to note here is that the problem will not end even if they separate. For, in the first place, their attitudes will continue to affect them even in their next relationship. Second, the emotional baggage that they will carry has to make a dent on their mind and psyche, which eventually will not allow them to behave normally with their future partners.
A look at their astrological pointers suggests that negatives in them are much less in proportion to their positive side. But the few negatives have been playing so heavy on them that their positives, which are immense, have taken a back seat. Both of them have been born in aries lagna, with its lord, the fiery mars prominently placed. This, by itself, is enough to mean that they are aggressive, impulsive, irritable, domineering, intolerant, and unrelenting. They will arrive at a conclusion or jump into action without applying proper forethought, and would realise only when the damage is already done. And then they will get into crisis management. What further plays spoil-sport with the guy is the fact that mars and its dire enemy saturn lock horns with each other. That makes him impatient, suspicious, bad-tempered, quarrelsome, revengeful, and reckless. On top of that, intelligence-signifying mercury is in conjunction with headless ketu and mischievous neptune, which makes him subject to self deception.
Towards, the girl’s end, mars locks horns with the sun, moon, and mercury. That makes her bad-tempered, irritable, hyper-critical, restless, quarrelsome, impulsive, argumentative, and emotionally unstable. Jupiter, adverse to neptune, makes her vulnerable and a subject to peculiar beliefs. Uranus in conjunction with saturn and neptune makes her eccentric, confused, chaotic, and the one who may misdirect her energies towards self-undoing ends.
So, they may decide to rebuild their relationship or separate, but they need to work upon their infirmities.
The writer is an astrologer, vastu consultant and spiritual counsellor. Write to him at G-5, Basement, Jungpura Extension, New Delhi 14 Tel: 9818037273/24310031 Email: pioneerqueries@bharatastro.com Webste: www.bharatastro.com